Jesse's Blog

I've only had 2 serious marriages in my life thus far.

My first was to RO, whom we got divorced because the love eventually got overshadowed by the work of BOTs and all the negative flames. Still, it was my first love and I will never forget it.

I recently brought my old old (and I mean ANCIENT) laptop to Phuket so I could save pictures in it (my camera has a teeny memory) and found my old RO screenies inside. I'll find a day and upload em all (there are hundreds...literally.) And looking through them, I realize that a part of my heart still belongs to RO and always will. It truly did change my life.

With WoW, I joined almost by chance, and definitely related to RO since Xiang and I tried WoW together. Xiang quitted WoW shortly after, but my affair with WoW ran on...and eventually caused my divorce from RO as I couldn't handle both games simulataneously.

I don't intend to ever divorce WoW, but I know the day will come. Hell, I never planned to leave RO either. We'll just take it a day at a time...

With a more serious (I would even say hardcore) game like WoW, people's true colours appear unlike in RO where everyone was fighting on the same side...and loots was never an issue with the use of BOTs.

I had a talk today with probably one of the more influential friends I have in WoW. I do not know him very long...but time is just a number.

I am very aware of my current...er...how do I put this...political dilemma. My current position is such that my personal WoW life is dragged into raid issues. I've always tried to keep a clear line between raid time and non-raid time...and to ignore what people say. Because in my heart, it's not raid that's important to me. But hearing people generate rumors is sometimes...well, it gets to me.

I won't deny that (one of the) primary reasons I raid is for someone. But it isn't the only reason. If not, I won't bother to login when I having exams and they not enuff people. If not, I wont willingly join other teams that I know is just using me because they don't have other people and if not they will throw me like rubbish. But it's all ok to me.

The comments hurt because I know that I'm taking on a lot of the misunderstanding between others. Because of my personal life, people see me differently now...and not in a good way. So when people say things that isn't true, that is more importantly, NONE OF THEIR BUSINESS. They just want to hurt people on purpose and not care about others who are affected. To spread rumors and spoil people's image.

It's only a game...I never do this to people...that people do to me, is upsetting.

I won't stop raiding because of the comments, but neither will I try to prove them wrong. Let them think whatever they wanna think. I just login if I got time and enjoy the game my own way. Raid or no. Politics or no. Relationship or no.

Anyway, I know that those important to me will never judge me like that. People that I will keep loyal to because they are true friends...like sifu and pp. In the end, those kinds of people are the only people that should ever matter...not those rubbish-talking people.